Why we smoke?
We may actually walk away from the relapse experience thinking we have gotten away with using. But it won’t be long before our brain is begging for more. Recovery isn’t about battling an entire pack, pouch, tin or box of our particular nicotine delivery vehicle. It’s about that first bolus of nicotine striking the brain, a hit that will end our journey, cost us liberty, and land us behind bars.
Unfortunately, conventional “quitting” wisdom invites relapse with statements such as “Don’t let a little slip put you back to smoking.” As Joel says, it’s like telling the alcoholic, “Don’t let a sip put you back to drinking” or the heroin addict, “Don’t let shooting-up put you back to using.” Experts are fond of stating that “on average, it takes between 3-5 serious quit attempts before breaking free of tobacco dependence,” and that “every time you make an effort you’re smarter and you can use that information to increase the likelihood that your subsequent quit attempt is successful.” What these so called experts fail to reveal is the precise lesson eventually learned.
Why? Why can’t it be taught and mastered prior to a user’s first attempt ever? They don’t teach it because most don’t understand it themselves. Instead they excuse failure before it even occurs, as if trying to protect the particular quitting product they are pushing from being blamed for defeat.
The lesson eventually gleaned from the school of hard-recovery-knocks is that “if I take so much as one puff, dip or chew I will relapse.” Just one, just once and defeat is all but assured. “The idea that you can’t quit the first time is absolutely wrong,” says Joel.120 “The only reason it takes most people multiple attempts to quit is that they don’t understand their addiction to nicotine. How could they, no one really teaches it. People have to learn by screwing up one attempt after another until it finally dawns on them that each time they lost it, it happened by taking a puff. If you understand this concept from the get-go, you don’t have to go through chronic quitting and smoking.”